I have been rereading Gordon MacDonald's book, "Ordering Your Private World". The chapter that has made me stop and think is the one where he says that we need to be sure that we know what we are called to - and then to order our lives according to that calling. I think, I hope, that this is part of God putting me back together to go out into the real world after seminary.
About a year ago I stopped stressing about 'call'. I was unhappy, but couldn't work out if it was something to do with my 'calling' and I wasn't getting anywhere struggling with it, so I let it go. It has in many ways been liberating. But at the beginning of this year I could not have formulated my 'call'. If someone had asked me to explain my call I would not have been able to - not that I didn't believe in it anymore - just the old words didn't apply.
But in the last little while (I'm not sure how long, time blurs) I have felt that God has been giving me a new sense of call. With new words. And I must admit that I am excited and very much overawed that Jesus should really want me.
So I am listening quite hard at the moment.