These are not exactly random thoughts, but perhaps sort of scribblings. I might not agree with myself in another frame of mind.
You don't believe in God and you go visit your good friend who is a believer in Jesus. She tells you there is a cup of coffee for you in the kitchen. Do you believe her? Probably, unless there is some arcane reason not to - like you hate coffee and she knows it, or it is your secret code for 'my little brother is at home, let's rather go watch a movie'. So believing without seeing is pretty much ok here.
Another day she tells you that there is a kangaroo in the kitchen. You check the calendar - not 1 April - and you go and have a look. No kangaroo to be seen. You look outside. Nothing. You look questioningly at your friend - it was here she assures you. Some people pass by - did they see the kangaroo? No. You see the neighbours outside - have they had a kangaroo in their kitchen? No. Have they seen one around? No. You tell your friend that there are no signs of the kangaroo having been in the kitchen. But she says - there are! It's just that the kangaroo has always been here so we don't recognise the signs. Those footprints in the butter that we always thought were the elephant? Uh-uh. Kangaroo! Those things that go crashing down for no apparent reason in the middle of the night? Kangaroo. Well, you scratch your head and decide to let it ride for the moment.
This time, she tells you that God is in the kitchen. You are just quiet. Look at her to see if she is serious. She seems to be. You go look in the kitchen. No God. He is here, she assures you. You go outside and check with the neighbours. Have you seen God? Has he been in your kitchen? You feel a bit of an idiot. Some of the neighbours laugh at you like you are playing a prank. Some laugh and say of course he is in the kitchen, God is everywhere. Is he here now? Yes, of course. You go back to the kitchen and tentatively say that there is no sign of God in the kitchen, but you can guess what is coming. It is just the God has always been here and so we don't see the signs. The way the sun shines through and catches the glass on the drying rack to make a little rainbow - that's God. The jingle of the windchime - that's God.
What do you believe? Coffee, no problem. Kangaroo, ridiculous. God, difficult. But you trust your friend. She is not stupid or delusional. Actually, we just made up the kangaroo - she never mentioned a kangaroo in the kitchen. Choose what you believe. It's your choice. That's all it is. A choice.