Meaning

I got an sms last night from the steward at Brentwood (the little church where I am involved part-time). Nothing serious - he has flu and we wouldn't be able to do the pastoral stuff we were planning for today. No sweat for me, there's no urgency. We can do it next week, next month, whatever. So sms him back, no problem, get better soon.
Then realise I'm starting to feel flat. What happened? Where'd my inspiration go? Oh, yes the sms. But no sweat, right?
Trouble is, from my point of view, that bit of pastoral work was the reason for today. Without it why should I get out of bed in the morning?
Small, small thing. Only really noticed because I'm thinking about these things. So today I'll be busy. Mostly with stuff that I do by myself. In some senses for myself.
I don't feel as depressed as that might sound - but it is little things like that that can feed depression. The sense that you don't do anything that really matters.