Tuesday, October 18, 2011

What am I afraid of?

I've been watching myself. That sounds odd, I guess. But the last ten days or so I have been watching to see when I feel stressed - what causes it, how do I react? I am surprised at how often I find myself being on 'red alert' to deal with some sort of problem or other that I anticipate. In general I think that I do ok.
But I've been asking myself a deeper question that I can't answer. I sometimes find myself in situations I find uncomfortable - or I may just suddenly feel insecure - and I am asking myself what I am fundamentally afraid of. What is making me unhappy? They say some people are driven by a need to be in control and so they fear losing control, others need to be competent and they fear being seen as incapable, others need to be liked . . . I don't know how far the list could go. I can't figure out what my basic fear is. Is there really such a thing?

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